There’s a person in my life who is really bugging me.
And I do mean really. Like wake-up-in-the-morning-and-there-she-is-in-my-head bugging.
I twirl with self-doubt, questioning what’s up with our brief interactions. Even when I stop spinning, I’m still dizzy from confusion. I let her ruin hours of a day before I ever get started on work. And letting her go is only a temporary solution at best. She always comes back, in my head anyway.
A friend who didn’t know anything about my concerns called last week to talk about a disturbing interaction with this same person.
“That woman has a problem,” she said.
Here’s the peculiar part about the “problem” woman, I’ve only been face-to-face with her twice. We’ve spent less than an hour in each other’s company. Well, excluding the hours I’ve entertained her in my thoughts.
As much as I appreciate my friend’s support, and I want to believe her when she says “It’s not you, it’s her,” I know better.
It is me.
Oh, no doubt, the woman is strange. Most people would agree her behavior is unacceptable. But since I’m the one reacting, even if it’s only rehearsed conversations in the bathroom mirror, I’m the one with an issue.
Why am I letting her bother me? What’s going on inside me?
Self-reflection is the only solution.
Is there someone hanging around in your head who might be encouraging you to reflect?
WRite wHere I’m supposed to be – I’ve yet to come up with a fitting answer to any of the questions about me. No spiritual solution has shown itself since I don’t think “punch her in the face” is comparable to “turn the other cheek.” However, I’m catching a glimpse of myself, the first step to getting better.
On the side: The photo is one I took of friends, and I just happened to catch myself as a reflection in the window.