Self-Acceptance and the Stubbed Toe

"Self-acceptance is my refusal to be in an adversarial relationship to myself." Nathaniel Brand, Artwork used by permission from Cindy DeLuz

“Self-acceptance is my refusal to be in an adversarial relationship to myself.”
Nathaniel Brand (Artwork by Cindy DeLuz)

“I took off all my clothes and stood in front of a full-length mirror. I told myself, ‘You’re going to stand here until you love what you see.’ It took time, but I did it. I walked away with some self-acceptance.

This quote is from an overweight friend who was at her wit’s end.

I thought of her just after I stubbed my toe in a frenzy to make our bed. My husband was on his way home for lunch. Instead of working that morning, I played on Facebook.

My little secret. Even though his iPhone notifies him each time I post, and hundreds of friends view my activity. Not to mention, there is a committee in my head that keeps up day-to-day.

“On Facebook again? Really? It’s all the time, isn’t it?

“Nothing unusual, of course. You promise yourself everyday to set limits, but you don’t.”

“No self control whatsoever.”

“What a marvelous day.”

Huh? Where’d that come from?

I’m not certain what brought my friend’s story to mind, or why my thoughts changed for the better. Maybe the pain in my foot brought to focus how much pain I inflict on myself emotionally. Maybe it was like a good talking-to.

A wake-up call, of sorts. 

WRite wHere I’m supposed to be – I’d stub my toe daily for a bit of loving reflection and self-acceptance.  How about you?

On the side: My friend and I believe her time in front of the mirror contributes to her ongoing weight loss.

Visit Cindy DeLuz’s website for more great art.


4 responses »

  1. I can always count on your writing to open a new window to being “Write Where I’m Supposed to Be”. I was talking, actually writing, to a cousin about stubbed toes this week. In my childhood going barefoot at Grandma’s, or many yards then where there were still many trees with big roots at the surface of the ground, we often stubbed our toes.Some folks call it stumped your toes. Anyway when it quit hurting, it felt much better, and we learned to avoid those places again, usually. We learned, and we remembered those days. Regarding the self acceptance, that is a nice link to stubbing toes with the story of your friend and how that self acceptance provides the avenue for change without negativity.

    • I love that reminder, Joel. I’d forgotten we used to call it stumping our toe, maybe because it was often on stumps when we were running around barefoot. I like what you wrote, “we learned to avoid those places …” Yep, stumped toes offer lots of lessons.

  2. Hey Kim and John!

    Hope you have a great Memorial Day weekend – loved spending time with you both and look forward to seeing you again in August. Thanks for this post, Kim – keep them coming, you write a great blog!


    • It was wonderful visiting with you and David. I hope the rest of your week was full of sun and fun. We had a wonderful weekend. It was nice to get away! See you in August to hear all about your travels.

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