I was fortunate to be chosen as one of the hosts for Jeff Goins’ online book tour for Wrecked. Thanks for taking the time to answer our questions, Jeff, and for writing a book that changes lives. Hope this weekend your dog is allowed on the couch.
Readers, read on …
What happens when we run hard and fast to shopping, food, alcohol, whatever, all the while trying to escape being wrecked? What then?
First, what doesn’t happen is you don’t overcome your restlessness. You don’t find satisfaction.
Second, your dissatisfaction eventually catches up to you. It’ll manifest as an affair or midlife crisis or neurotic breakdown. If you don’t willingly get wrecked now, you’ll unintentionally get wrecked later.
What if after being wrecked, we’re not sure what to do next? I’ve heard people say they have no direction. Is this possible or is it an excuse to stay on the couch?
This is typical — in fact it’s why I wrote the book.
I’m not sure if it’s an excuse or not, but it’s inaccurate. How do you get direction? You start moving. It honestly doesn’t matter where you head; you just need to build momentum. Think of a bicycle. Pointing it in the right direction does little good. A bicycle needs to be moving, and once it is, it’s much easier to direct. The same is true for our lives.
If readers only learn one thing from Wrecked, what do you hope the lesson will be?
I hope they consider something uncomfortable they haven’t done that they should. I’m not talking about skydiving or eating sushi for the first time; I’m talking about forgiving someone or telling the truth when you’d rather not. I’m talking about the simple, but difficult, choices that define us.
What’s the best advice you have for parents when it comes to their children’s wreckage?
Let it happen now so it doesn’t have to happen later. Again, getting wrecked is inevitable. The question is: when will it happen? In the company of people you love, in the context of community — where you can process it and better understand it? Or when you’re on your own and will most likely wallow in the pain for far too long?
One of my former pastors once preached that three things change us: when we’ve been given enough, when we’ve learned enough, and when we’ve gone through enough pain. Do you agree? Does this fit the thinking behind Wrecked?
Yes, I think so. Pain is not necessarily good, but it can cause good. In fact, most growth happens in the context of painful situations. Suffering is often a prerequisite for God to trust us; it is the backdrop for our faithfulness and perseverance.
We have a bunch of quote fanatics who hang around our blog. Do you have a favorite quote or two?
“We can do no great things, only small things with love.” — Mother Teresa
Finally, Jeff, since you’re interviewing on Well-Written Days blog, describe a well-written day in your life.
It begins with breakfast, as all good days do. And I’m not talking about oatmeal. Eggs and bacon and French-press coffee; pancakes and syrup that sticks to everything. This is a meal that will stay with you for the whole day, one fit for farmers and field workers. And it all happens before the sun rises.
Then to writing. If I can do 1000 words, I’m elated. But it’s not the product that I’m proud of; it’s the process. That’s what gives me life — the act of writing at all.
After that, exercise. I love moving and sweating, as well as burning fat and building muscle.
And then, time with the family. Maybe a walk around the block or a picnic in the park. We would finish the day with steaks on the grill. The weather would be perfect: mid 70s with just a slight breeze. Following dinner would be a movie together. We’d all cuddle on the couch and just this once the dog would be allowed on the furniture — all for the sake of a good snuggle.
And then we’d all drift off to sleep together, dreaming of the best day ever.